1/29/12

I just noticed that InfoWars.com, the website of hyper-entertaining conspiracy guy, Alex Jones, the self-described "Tyrannosaurus Rex of Talk Radio," from Austin, TX, has a small ad in this week's Inlander magazine.
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Canadians in space, eh? Two Toronto teens launched a Lego man almost 80,000 feet above sea level--high enough to capture video of the plastic toy hovering above the curvature of the Earth.

1/28/12

If I said:

Because we are bombing Somalia, bombing Yemen and Pakistan by remote control, bombing Afghanistan; because we dropped tens of thousands of tons of bombs on Libya; because we have special forces in 75 countries, and because we sold tens of billions of dollars of weapons to dictators in Saudi Arabia --

If I said this "has made the United States safer and more respected around the world," I would be drug out into the street and beaten to death with peace signs.

Yet, someone said this last Tuesday and tens of millions of Americans applauded.

Can someone explain this to me?

1/27/12

Gov. Jan Brewer's book on border security, federalism and the "liberal media," just went from No. 343,222 to No. 10 on Amazon's bestseller list -- in 24 hours -- following the highly publicized on-the-tarmac confrontation Wednesday between the governor and the president as he stepped off Air Force One to make a speech in Arizona.

1/26/12

Having survived the carnival show of the State of the Union Address (SOTU) and the Repub response, certain facts remain clear:

1) Both Democratic and Republican politicians initiated and supported bailouts.
2) Both Democratic and Republican politicians initiated and supported mandates on individuals and small businesses to buy medical insurance.
3) Both Democratic and Republican politicians have voted for a long list of new and expanded government programs – keeping taxes high and our debt staggering.
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Following the SOTU, Mootsys' insightful bartender, Jon Brown, Facebooked: 
"Why is Vladimir Putin delivering the Republican rebuttal?"
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"On the day I took office, our auto industry was on the verge of collapse. Some even said we should let it die. With a million jobs at stake, I refused to let that happen." -- The president's SOTU address, 1/24.

"It's time to apply the same rules from top to bottom: No bailouts, no handouts, and no copouts. An America built to last insists on responsibility from everybody." -- The president's SOTU address, 1/24.

1/25/12

IT'S PEOPLE!!! (Well, depending on who you ask.)

Freshman Republican state senator Ralph Shortey from Oklahoma City introduced a bill Tuesday that would ban the use of aborted human fetuses in food. He said his own Internet research led him to believe such a ban is necessary. I can't wait to see the bills he'll cough up when he reads about the alien lizard-people ruling elite.
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At the last minute, Bloomberg cancelled this awesome cover idea after New York magazine beat them to press.

1/24/12

I have to admit that after the orgy of butt-smooching and backslapping and wink winking, and after the endless applauding, and after the president praising the military, and the generals standing and clapping and congratulating themselves and smiling all assured they're still in biz, and their rows of medals all glimmering and shining, and after I stopped retching and gagging, I have to admit that the president, as usual, gave a pretty good speech.
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You'd think that a solar storm during a snow storm would cancel each other out, like putting Kahlua in your mocha.

1/23/12

Okay, the Paulites have finally gone too far.

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Well-fed economists are predicting that the price of peanut butter will rise. Look for the cost of grog and porridge to follow suit.
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If you watch tomorrow's State of the Union Address on the Whitehouse.gov website, you are promised that "you’ll be able to see charts, stats and data that helped inform President Obama’s policy decisions as he delivers his speech to the nation."
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See, they have a heart. Carnival Corp. is offering a 30 percent discount on future cruises to survivors of its deadly Costa Concordia shipwreck off the Italian coast. 

1/22/12

The biggest hypocrite in yesterday's SC Primary was not The Newt himself, but the 44% bloc of white, evangelical Christians -- touting family values and love-of-neighbor -- who voted for the adulterous warmonger.
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I just watched Please Vote For Me, a 2007 documentary film following the elections of a 3rd grade class in China. As the candidates compete for the coveted role of class monitor, you can see the personas of our current candidates and politicians in the scheming, conniving, back-slapping and conspiring of these eight year old children.

I just saw it on PBS Global Voices, but it's also streaming on Netflix.
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One of the great stories of our rumble-tumble attempt at democracy was buried amid hype of the SC Primary. Because of an uprising of indignation across the internet, congress has indefinitely put aside any discussion or vote on the latest corporate attempt to control the web. You can almost taste in the e-air the collective resolve to utterly crush and humiliate any similar, future assaults on our internet liberties.
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Have you Rolfed yet? Here's three amazingly bizarre and entertaining films from Australian director Rolf de Heer, all streaming on Netflix:

Alexandra's Project - Bad Boy Bubby - Encounter at Raven's Gate

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NYT's Maureen Dowd suggests that the election could be between two powerful victims yearning to be lonely at the top.

1/21/12

 Newt wins...
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I have to say it: Do The Right Thing, South Carolina. But, in my heart, I know they're about to do just the opposite. 

With two Air Force bases, an Army base, two Marine bases, three Naval bases and over 600 industries directly related to the military, South Carolina is about to reveal the Big Decision facing America today: will we continue to accept and promote and expand the war culture, or will we not? 

My prediction: Newt Gingrich to win SC by a military-brass-browned nose, along with the need for more conflict, more war, more bombs, and more of your children coming home cold in boxes.
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Real time vote count from South Carolina.

1/20/12

Everyone's freaking out about the snow berms in the middle of the streets. I love the berms. They make driving and walking through downtown Spokane a new and exciting adventure. Certain illegalities are tolerated because of berms: Jaywalking is required; and when driving, making a two or three lane change without any forward progress is commonly practiced. Cops just shake their head, then do the same. And, there are few joys as primal and satisfying as vehicular berm-busting, altering the maze, declaring boldly that you are no Spokane lab rat.
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Check out this guy's Facebook page. He married his dead girlfriend in a wedding/funeral service. If you search, you can find video of the event, if you really want to. 

I didn't.
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Occupy the Courts protesters clash with Supreme Court police in Citizens United protest.
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The entire Spokane School District -- and nearly every other surrounding district -- are shut down because of snow!
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Seattle is all upset because the LA Times called them snow wimps. I think they are kind of wimpy, but the LA Times saying it is like some smarmy royal on his throne dissing his subjects for complaining about having to sit on sackcloth. "We all have chairs, right?"
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The polls are saying that the South Carolina Primary is between Romney and Gingrich. I think it'll be closer to a four-way tie.
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Let's put the "Fun" back in funeral. The 130th National Funeral Directors Conference just wrapped up in Chicago. Here's what we missed: “Marketing Your Cemetery: Connecting With Your Community” and “Managing Mass Fatality Situations,” as well as “The Difference Is In The Details,” an embalming workshop. These guys know how to party.
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Today the Occupy Movement will Occupy the Courts, a one day occupation of Federal courthouses across the country, including the U.S. Supreme Court in Washington, D.C. The purpose is to protest a landmark U.S. Supreme Court decision that removed most limits on corporate and labor spending in federal elections. Keeping it interesting, a judge yesterday ruled that demonstrators do not have a First Amendment right to protest in front of a Manhattan federal courthouse.
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The tortured lives and spiritual anguish of three great modern poets.

1/19/12

Here's the current list of the websites that were shut down or destabilized this afternoon by the shadowy hacker group Anonymous:

Department of Justice (Justice.gov)
Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA.org)
Universal Music (UniversalMusic.com)
Belgian Anti-Piracy Federation (Anti-piracy.be/nl/)
Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA.org)
Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI.gov)
HADOPI law site (HADOPI.fr)
U.S. Copyright Office (Copyright.gov)
Universal Music France (UniversalMusic.fr)
Senator Christopher Dodd (ChrisDodd.com)
Vivendi France (Vivendi.fr)
The White House (Whitehouse.gov)
BMI (BMI.com)
Warner Music Group (WMG.com)

This amazing show of power supposedly was in response to the Feds shutting down the file hosting and sharing site Megaupload.

But -- surprise, surprise -- I smell a rat. Here's my conspiracy theory: Anonymous is to play the role (unwittingly or not) of the new cyber-Al Qaeda, another dangerous terrorist group that we have to throw money at, create more security agencies, and give up more personal and internet liberties so the Feds can "protect us."
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What if it doesn't stop snowing?
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Rick Perry drops out of the race; endorses Gingrich. End of chapter, right?

No. Sheriff Perry is gonna have to contend with a whole different kind of posse when he moseys back to Austin, where he was (past tense) generally thought of as a tough conservative and an astute campaigner -- claims that really didn't manifest in his latest run for glory. 

I think the next few months will reveal that his dirty-elbowed Texan buddies would rather ride side-saddle than carry the flag behind this cowboy.
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Gingrich's ex-wife says she could run Ship Newt into the rocks because of his request for an "open marriage."

Gingrich daughters say "not true."
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Google says it collected more than 7 million signatures from the U.S. for its online petition to Congress during yesterday's Internet protest against anti-piracy legislation.
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Yesterday, Ron Paul introduced a piece of legislation that will repeal section 1021 of the National Defense Authorization Act -- the loosely defined section that allows for the indefinite detention of American citizens without due process or evidence.
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Santorum is the actual winner of the Iowa Caucus! 
With the votes finally certified, Rick beats Mitt by 34 votes. 
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Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg deemed the SOPA/PIPA controversy worthy enough to post his first tweet in almost three years. "Tell your congressmen you want them to be pro-internet," he wrote, linking to a longer statement on his Facebook page.

1/18/12

Despite this country's need for jobs, Obama made the right decision in rejecting rapid approval of the pipeline from Canada to Texas. Too often decisions of great consequence are pushed on desperate people. We need a chance to educate ourselves, listen to the critics and the proponents, hash it out, and then decide. As it stands, most of the folks who will have to deal with this in their backyard probably know as little about it as I.
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The POWER of protest, democracy and giving a damn: Eight US lawmakers have withdrawn their backing from anti-piracy laws, amid protests on thousands of internet sites!
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UNBELIEVABLE!!! The last sentence Senator Joe Lieberman utters here should be branded on his forehead just below the three sixes.
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We finally got four inches of the white stuff! (And no, I'm not talking about Lil' Jacob, East Sprague's favorite male prostitute.)
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Hey, Seattle! How does it feel? Ha!!!
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This website stands with Wikipedia and many others in their opposition to the US Stop Online Piracy Act (Sopa) and Protect Intellectual Property Act (Pipa) as currently written and currently being debated by Congress.

Click here to learn more.
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Another example of bad laws used against good people.
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Still waiting for the woeful and wondrous white poop of the snow demons. As of 5:30 this morning, nary an inch of the ethereal effluvia is polluting God's green earth.

1/17/12

Four syllables, weather wenches: SNOW-PA-CA-LYPSE. The Mayans and Spokane TV weather witch doctors predicted it, so you know it's true. And did you pay heed to good Uncle Stik about stocking up on canned goods and R&R and mari- ...ah, -nara... sauce? ...for those late nights, when you're all kicked back, the weather outside is frightful, your feet are all cozy in front of the fire, and you want to enjoy a nice bowl of marinara? 

Maybe next time you heathens will listen to me.
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Libertarian Illusions. Here's a pretty good critique of Ron Paul's stanch libertarianism. I don't totally agree with the article but it's good food for thought. I link to this after seeing a ridiculously inaccurate and deceptive hit piece that's been passed around on Facebook about Paul that was put out by MoveOn.org.
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Nothing is not anything like you thought or didn't think it was or wasn't.

1/16/12

This is the best year for politics ever! I just watched the Republican debates in South Carolina. Newt, Santorum and Perry all played the crowd like fiddles. Ron Paul stumbled. Mitt held his own. Here's how they placed IMHO: It was as close to a five-way tie as you can get. Whether it was a tie for first or last is debatable.
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I filmed today at the Martin Luther King rally of a few thousand people downtown. There were city cops on every corner. Two of the cops -- a nice, elderly lady, and a woman who looked like my mom's hairdresser in the Sixties -- waved and joked with the marchers. Other cops smiled and waved as well and I got the shivers. I saw no evidence of the VIPR boogie men rumored to be creeping about. Later, I heard birds singing.
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Huntsman is out -- will bail from the presidential race today and endorse Romney. 

Santorum gets a big boost with the endorsement of an influential evangelical Christian group, which is a big deal: Santorum is Catholic, which many fundamentalists consider a pagan religion and seat of The Anti-Christ. Go figure.

Ron Paul returned to South Carolina after taking four days off from campaigning where presumably he stayed up until 8:00 pm doing Geritol shooters and reading econ textbooks.

Newt and Perry will paint their faces black and do a minstrel show in honor of King's birthday.

Mitt, enjoying front runner status, will attempt not to do or say anything stupid. 

1/15/12
                        

  WWMLKD?

What would Martin Luther King Jr. do if he marched in the Spokane Martin Luther King Parade tomorrow?

He would see the presence of the TSA/Homeland Security soldiers and apparatus (named VIPR so to inspire fear in the population) and he -- who relentlessly denounced militarism and warmongering -- would step up to those manifestations of the police state and would beat on the side of those Homeland Security trucks with his Holy Bible until he was drug away, handcuffed, with bright red pepper spray smeared all over his beautiful, black face..

1/14/12

HAPPENING NOW! The VIPR program comes to Spokane! Yesterday a STA bus was pulled over by Homeland Security without cause or provocation and searched with dogs. We need to let these people know that we do not accept this form of Neo-Nazism in our city. Say it to their face!

This Monday, while we denounce MLK parade wannabe bomber Kevin Harpham's backwoods Nazism, we also need to denounce the TSA/Homeland Security high-tech Nazism. Say it to their face! NO NAZIS IN SPOKANE!
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It's a sad day for the downtown restaurant/bar culture. The Globe Bar and Grille is making its last last call tonight, after 14 years of service. Let's all remember The Globe's talented and interesting staff when they come knocking at the back kitchen door.
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Could you pass the US citizenship test?

My favorite question: 

     41. Name one war fought by the United States in the 1900s.
               a) Civil War
               b) Revolutionary War
               c) World War I
               d) War of 1812

     People who answer (d) are taken out in the courtyard and shot.

1/13/12

Jon Stewart on Ron Paul's second place finish in New Hampshire.

1/11/12

Let's stop creating monsters.
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Harry Belafonte: Obama Doesn’t Deserve a Second Term, Lacks ‘Moral Compass’
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I predict that Rick Perry -- accompanied by circus music -- will juggle something during the next debate. 
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One of the great mysteries about yesterday's NH primary is that Michelle Bachmann, who dropped out of the race entirely, still convinced nearly 400 New Hampshire Republicans to give her their precious vote.
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2012 presidential primaries, caucuses, and conventions chronologically.

1/10/12

Romney wins New Hampshire fairly strongly; Ron Paul with a strong second place; Huntsman with a disappointing third, given that he put so much into doing well there. Newt and Santorum shared a distant fourth. As I've said before, Newt will always be Newt. And Santorum -- his ego Iowa-stroked -- will be harder to get rid of than a stain from a sheet. Rick Perry sang and danced with a bear.
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Here's the real-time vote count from New Hampshire.
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Penn Jillette: An Atheist's Guide to the 2012 Election.
(No, I'm not an atheist. But some of my favorite people are.)

1/09/12

I just got back from a short but thoroughly awesome road trip to Mt. St. Helens. While the road is usually closed during the winter, I drove all the way to the Johnson Ridge Observatory -- just a few miles from the crater. Very impressive. Photos and video to follow.
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Regarding the quiz from Saturday: Celilo Falls was inhabited by Native American fishing communities for thousands of years until it was flooded by the backwaters of The Dalles Dam. Today it's all blacktop, chain link fences, No Trespassing signs, and fat, old white people with yapping poodles in oversized RVs.

1/07/12

Today I'm visiting what was the oldest continuously inhabited community on the North American continent, where native settlements and trading villages existed in various configurations for 15,000 years until 1957. No, it's not Hillyard. Any other guesses?

1/06/12

So amazing. Stephen Colbert humiliates Obama for signing the National Defense Authorization Act.
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Network Solutions is now offering .XXX domains for $129.99 a year, "available to members and non-members of the adult entertainment industry." Who says we're not creating new jobs?

1/05/12

Slow time at work. I feel a road trip coming on. Stay tuned.
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I ran into my friend Arp Xigar yesterday at the downtown library. Our short discussion resulted in no property damage and no civilian injuries.
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The media is finding ways of dealing with Santorum's "Google problem." I'm still working on it.
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Denver police arrested a woman who pulled down her pants in the Clyfford Still Museum and tried to urinate on the celebrated artist's $30 million painting -- which was hanging on the wall. I'm trying to form some kind of mental image of how she went about this; but...

1/04/12

Romney wins Iowa, barely squeaking by Santorum by eight votes! Mitt and the Rickster each earn 25% of the vote. Ron Paul comes in third with 21%. 

This is Santo's brief moment of glory, having no money and no organization to go beyond Iowa. Paul supporters are already damaging themselves by claiming conspiracy because of "secret vote counting" or something. And Mitt is the same Mitt that Republicans didn't like in the first place. 

The big winner in Iowa: Barack Obama.
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Rick Perry is out, and now he's in; he's out, he's in. Does even Rick Perry know for sure?

She expected a miracle and a miracle did occur: Michele Bachmann's out.

Newt will be Newt no matter what happens.
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High temp of 69 in Walla Walla today. In Spokane, a high of 57.

1/03/12

Do the right thing, Iowa...
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Prediction: The Santorum Surge will become a euphemism for a new kinky sex act (probably somehow involving corn).
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Did you know that a guy named Thaddeus McCotter (no relation to my friend Stony McWeedseeder) actively ran for the Republican nomination? Me neither. He dropped out of the race on Sept. 22. 

Did you know that a guy named Buddy Roemer is still actively running? No, me neither.

1/02/12

Randy Bachman on that first fabulous chord in The Beatles' Hard Day's Night.
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Obama had mere "reservations" about ending Habeas Corpus and the Sixth Amendment? Bullshit. He could and should have vetoed it, preserved nearly 250 years of America tradition, and used the opportunity to denounce this new American Nazism.
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Warmongering: It's good for the economy and great for elections!
U.S. fighter sales soar in time for campaign.
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Record hits yesterday: 11,500

1/01/12

It's law, my friends. The treason is complete. We HAVE been sold out. Again.
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Here's some further predictions for the year 2012:

(1) Ron Paul will win the Iowa Caucus.
(2) Ron Paul will be accused of hating puppies, poisoning wells and Satanism.
(3) Sarah Palin will be doing Shake Weight commercials by 2013.
(4) Some horrible natural disaster will happen and the media will say it's the most horrible that's happened since the last one.
(5) Meet the Press host, David Gregory, will start parting his hair on the other side and not provide any explanation. People will die.
(6) People will talk about how a meteor might or might not hit planet Earth.
(7) NBC reporter Andrea Mitchell will dump ex-Federal Reserve chair Alan Greenburg and shack with Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner. Their love child will be the Antichrist.
(8) Chris Matthews and Lady Gaga.
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Given the state of world events and collective human consciousness, there's still an 83.7 % chance the world could end on 12/21/12. So, let's not give the Mayans too much credit.
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"Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed."
     Schopenhauer
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Don't stop now!
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