BACKGROUND
It is late - hours past The
Scene magazine's deadline. Red-eyed
editor Stik Mann is shocked to find a large block of
white space. He sets Arp in front of a computer, places
his hand on my shoulder and says in a fatherly voice,
"Arp, it's times like these when greatness is born.
You have ten minutes. Fill this space."
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A Very Special
Fireside Recital of
The
Ballad
of Arp
by
ArpXigar
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Arp stands. Firelight animates his face like a photo cut
up and shuffled around with pieces of a broken mirror in
the bottom of a shoe box. He speaks.
In a land far begone, in
a time beknotted of twists and turns
There came The Arp.
Bearing the Horn of Turgid Oblique
The Arp did don a garment of sheerest lace, the wind
warbled
Ooooooooooooooooo!
The Arp withstood the
grevith blow for there were reasons of import
Greater than the delphi OZ
Of Gunner there was no assist - The White Tadpole was
spent
And so came The Arp
abreast
to annihilate the
White Tadpole
Ooooooooooooooooo!
Let there be a tale, a
fable of time, the story has but arisen
Dark was the day when The Arp rode forth
To slay the dreaded dragon of paleness - for injury and
insult
Heaped in pustules of bile consorting with the spirit
everlasting
The Arp knew of no shrouded thread than it
Ooooooooooooooooo!
Let the wind moan its
narssistic plee for the end of all
Nay! Stay the hand, shade the eyes, not yet forebear
Oh sad be the moment , shed liquid salt for what is to
come
Send Oz the message for the terrible truth
Bring Gunner, at the Loom, the brightly woven thread
For within and without The Arp is dead
Ooooooooooo!
Silent be the cries,
make peace of the wind, pile on the pyre
The flames shall eat of flesh tonight; but not of soul
Oh Arp of Cammal, bestower of Mal-boro, bringer of Lite
Oh Arp - the brightest thread of all
Oooooooooooooo!
Nevermore of karma shall
an armpit drink of God
Whence of good can The Arp have left
And what of the White Tadpole you may question
It lies shrivelled and broken within a deep moist cave,
the skies
Never will see its likeness again
Fare thee well Arp
Of Oz t'will be made many a heroic parlay
And Gunner will incite song of such worth your name will
not be
Forgotten
Oooooooooooooo
Wail wind of the ages
The Arp is dead
Return to
Stik Mann's OtherSpokane
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